|
[Do
you really expect anyone to come to this site?]
Why are you such an asshole? Asking a question like that is designed
to make me mad, isn't it? Well, you know what? I saw your mom last night on
second street, sucking bums' dicks for nickels. My site may not be as good
as ebay, since I won't sell you a mint edition Buck Rogers board game, but
it's surely more fun than watching you try to pick up women by quoting Monty
Python. Wait. That is more fun than my site.
[Why do
you post pictures of nude women on your blog? Don't you realize that
such pictures are degrading?]
While I'm glad you managed to take the time away from not shaving
your legs to visit my site, I have to disagree with the basic premise of your
question. But rather than tell you why your logic is faulty, I'd rather use
this space to tell you to get the fuck away from my site, and never return.
In fact, just knowing you stayed around long enough to submit a question makes
me want to jump through the monitor and donkey punch you.
[Who do
you think would win in a fight, Batman or Superman?]
Dude, you need to get laid like a box of crayons needs blue.
But, since your question wasn't a complaint, I'll tell you what I think. Superman
would reduce Bruce Wayne to a smoking mess on the floor of the Batcave. Then
he'd piss on the smoking mess. Then he'd laugh.
[Why do
birds suddenly appear, everytime you are near?]
Mostly because I'm covered in Suet.
[Since
Britney Spears has become white trash, do you think I have a chance to
nail her?]
Get over it. She may may have lost all respect for herself,
but she's still too famous to date you. Try setting your sights lower and younger,
like
Jamie
Spears. She will surely want to follow in her sister's slutty footsteps. And
when she does, I think she'll want to trump her sister by going even trashier.
Which means you could easily nail her with no more than an airplane bottle
of Bacardi and a firm pimp hand.
[Are you
a good person? Do you believe in eternal salvation?]
Wait a second. Are you that douche-bag from my apartment complex
who's been leaving religious pamphlets on my doorstep (and only my doorstep)
every Sunday? Like the one that claims the banana disproves evolution? Or that
very
confusing
one
about
tearing
out
your
eyes
rather than sinning? If I ever catch you visiting my site again, I'm going
to tie you to a chair and make you watch me play Grand Theft Auto III, after
which I'm going to make love to your leg while dressed as Satan.
But the good times wouldn't end there, you judgemental, holier-than-thou,
sanctimonious fuck. After I waste my precious seed all over your shoe, we're
going to listen to Howard Stern and find out how many times a guy tied to a
chair can get kicked in the nuts. I bet it's a lot.
[You sound
angry. Are you Angry?]
Not really. But thanks for caring. Now go mind your own business,
fucktard. |
